Television and Movie Quotes

[Akai]

Rules: Only post quotes that you hear on TV or in movies that you really like. Don't post anything stupid like "Pokemon" for any Pokemon movie. It must be an actual sentence.


Remember to post what TV show or movie it's from!!

And only limit yourself to a couple a post.


~~~~~~~~~~

"I reject your reality and subsitute my own!" -Mythbusters (TV) [I got stuck watching it and that was in the opening credits.]

(an erotic dancer comes in, dances on the first man)
[guard] "He's a unic..."
(goes to the next guy, dancing more erotic)
"He's a unic..."
(goes to the next guy, dancing even more erotic)
"...He's dead!" -History of the World: Part 1 (Movie)

(one of the main characters at the 'Last Supper')
(slightly angry) "Jesus..."
"Yes?"
"What?"
"What?"
"What!?"
"Yes?"
(sighs) "Jesus..."
"What?" -History of the World: Part 1 (Movie)

[HobbesI]

Bryan: Wow, I never knew it really looked like that from up here.
Stewie: Yeah, I know. Capital Print too.
[Family Guy, while Stewie and Bryan are looking from a hot air balloon. The ground shows up like a map of the US]

[Akai]

(I think it's Brian, with an I, since in one episode, they mis-say it as 'Brain'.)
((I love that one.))

"What? That's his name! D1ck Trickles: The famous racecar driver!" -That's 70's Show (TV)

[Alexi8945]

Ah, I do so love Mythubusters...<3

"Lamos!" - Paul, from Pokemon, when Ash and Turtwig were under the hypnosis of a bunch of stantler. I thought it was hilarious that he said that when Ash's life was in danger.

"This really is the map to El Dorado!"
"...You drank sea water again, didn't you?" - The Road to El Dorado

That's all I got for now...Man, I have not seen a movie in daaaays...

[Akai]

Ah, I do so love Mythubusters...<3

Then you should like this:

"Quack, d*mn you." -Mythbusters (TV)

(Ducks are funny)

"Grant Imahara! I need your nose!" -Mythbusters (TV)

[HobbesI]

(Underwater scene)
Dr. Zoidberg: My house is destroyed!
Hermes: This raises questions...
Bender: Oh! There's where I left my cigar... *walks over to ruins, picks up cigar*
Hermes: That raises even further questions!
[Futurama]

I don't watch Family Guy that much, so I'm not sure if it's Brian or Bryan. Probably the first though.

[Alexi8945]

"It's like the kite of death. The kite of punishment!" - Mythbusters (Tori)

"I wouldn't say Jaimie's an evil genius..." - Mythbusters (Adam)

:D

[Akai]

"I wouldn't say Jaimie's an evil genius..." - Mythbusters (Adam)

I like to follow that one up with, "He's not evil... and he's certainly not a genius." (XDDD)

[Alexi8945]

XD We all know that...

"It's like looking into the face of GOD! Seriously!!"
"Hm...Takes the fun out of watching television." - Attack of the Show

[Akai]

"Kif! I have made it with a woman... Inform the men." -Futurama (TV)

(It cracks me up every time.)

[Alexi8945]

XP I don't watch Futurama as much as I want to. ._.

"We get our opera!"
"She gets her lime light..." Phantom of the Opera. XP I just loved the actor's expression when he said that in the movie production.

[Akai]

"When a grown man attacks another grown man in the shower, there's three things you can do, guys: Ready? One- Grab the goods, Two- Giggle, Three- Kick 'Get away! Get away!'" -Comedy Central Presents (TV)

[Alexi8945]

"San Francisco. Home to cows. Cows that look...weird." - Eddie Izzard

[Akai]

Mademoiselle Rimbaud: Your Majesty! I was raised in a convent. I don't indulge in pleasures of the flesh.
King Louis XVI: You don't put out, he don't get out.
Mademoiselle Rimbaud: Your Majesty, I simply don't do it.
King Louis XVI: Come on, you do it. You love to do it. We all do it. You do it...
Mademoiselle Rimbaud: No, I don't!
King Louis XVI: I do it, I love to do it. I just did it and I'm ready to do it again, don't tell me you don't do it!

-History of the World Part 1 (movie)

[Alexi8945]

"You were so close...so warm..." - Hannibal Lecter in Hannibal. Man, that boy is creepy...o.O

[Shiny Espeon]

"Kif! I have made it with a woman... Inform the men." -Futurama (TV)

(It cracks me up every time.)

XD

"Branagon's law." - The Captain, lol

edited by SR: lets try to keep this mild.

[Akai]

"Hey, Ross, if the Homo sapians were, in fact, homo sapians... is that why they're extinct?"
"Joey... Homo sapians are people."
*a little offended* "Hey. I'm just saying." -Friends (TV)

[Alexi8945]

...Could video game quotes be posted here to??

Well, anyway..

"By the way....I'm a boy."
"What? He's prettier than Sakura!" - Haku and Naruto, from Naruto...shocking!

[Akai]

I'd rather you didn't.

NO VIDEO GAMES. Just TV and Movies.

[T-Master]

XD We all know that...

"It's like looking into the face of GOD! Seriously!!"
"Hm...Takes the fun out of watching television." - Attack of the Show

From GI Joe (http://youtube.com/watch?v=KzB-bjXAS4Y) skit:
Baroness: I love watching Two and A Half Men.
Cobra Commander: COBRA-LALALALALALA!

Olivia: Turns out McHammer isn't dead, or so he says. (http://youtube.com/watch?v=Fb27wb8UpOE)

[Akai]

Which TV show or movie does that appear on? NO YOUTUBE.

[Alexi8945]

Alexi thinks T-Master is quoting Attack of the Show, as he quotes Olivia, who is a co-host. Is Alexi right, T-Master?

"You...You ate all the contraband!"
"Nah, there's still a couple of gorgonzolas left, boss."
"You're a couple of gorgonzolas!" - Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island

[Akai]

He needs to put the show or movie it's from and note it with either (TV) or (movie). Common sense.

[Shiny Espeon]

"No, I hate you. You make Josh miserable, which is my job!" - Meagen from Drake and Josh. She was talking to Mindy in this scene, which was Josh's assignment partner.

[Akai]

"Without this show, I'm nothing!"
"Nothing builds character!" -Hairspray (movie)

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Mr. Link. Can you tell me Patrick Henry's famous last words?"
"...Kiss my a**." -Hairspray (movie)

[Shiny Espeon]

I wish I could have seen the entire movie. ;-;

"Hey, I know something fun! Let's go to Taco Bell." - Karen from Mean Girls.

[Akai]

"I can't go to Taco Bell. I'm on an all carb diet! God, Karen, you're such an idiot!" -Mean Girls (Movie)

[Alexi8945]

"Jamie want big boom." - Mythbusters, the only show Alexi watches.

[Akai]

Mythbusters PWNs all. >=)

"Eat it... It's corn, that tastes like candy.... Whee!" -Comedy Central Presents (Lewis Black) ((TV))

[Alexi8945]

"It just makes you feel so good..." - Proactive commercial. Just thought it sounded awkward. o.O

[Akai]

"Can you check on a John Doe?... You know, actually, look up all the Does: Tai kwan, cookie, do-si." -Pyshe commercial (TV) ...Cracked me up. So clever.

"This is the Physics department."
"Well, that explains all the gravity." -Family Guy (TV)

[Alexi8945]

"I think Cloverfield was okay, but I'd like to see more explosions and flaming hobos." - Attack of the Show

[Catty]

Remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets! - Spongebob Squarepants

Guess what I found in my sock last night. Go ahead, guess! - Spongebob Squarepants

I love the species that throws their own feces.
Cosmo, when the world is being ruled by apes

[Akai]

Remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets! - Spongebob Squarepants

*Falls to floor, crippled in laughter* That was so random. You get a gold star! ;)

Satine: A little supper? Maybe some champagne?
Christian: I'd rather, um, just get it over and done with.
Satine: Hmph. Oh. Very well. Then why don't you come down here and let's get it over and done with.
Christian: I prefer to do it standing.
Satine: Oh. [starts to stand]
Christian: You don't have to stand, I mean. It's sometimes that... It's quite long and I'd like you to be comfortable. It's quite modern what I do and it may feel a little strange at first, but I think, if you're open, then you might enjoy it.
Satine: I'm sure I will...

...Haha... Get it? From Moulin Rouge (Movie)

[Alexi8945]

"I don't know if we can handle this, Adam. We're using this thing in the manner that it was meant to be used." - Jaimie, Mythbusters

"Ever notice how many robots Grant has made in his likeness? It's like he's cloning himself to make a small army to take over the world." - Carrie, Mythbusters.

[Akai]

"You see there, Peggy, that's what's called a loaded question. No matter what I answer there's a bullet in each chamber ready to blow my brains out." -King of the Hill (TV)

[Alexi8945]

"There's poo everywhere!" - Jaimie, Mythbusters. Nothing like those big scientific words from those smart, smart scientists.

[Akai]

"Ssss-ahh." (repeat about 50 ba-zillion times) -Family Guy (TV) ...Remember when he fell down? That was so annoying.

[Shiny Espeon]

Guess what I found in my sock last night. Go ahead, guess! - Spongebob Squarepants

XD I remember that!

"Ssss-ahh." (repeat about 50 ba-zillion times) -Family Guy (TV) ...Remember when he fell down? That was so annoying.

I saw that last night! I was laughing so hard!

"I gotta tell Quagmire! Quick! To the Petercopter!"

*gets into helicopter to fly two houses down. Helicopter eventually gets caught in a tree, and it then falls to the ground where the still-active helicopter destroys Joe's front lawn*

"Peter, what the ****?!"

"Oh my God Joe, I'm so sorry!" - Family Guy

[Akai]

Haha! That's good TV!

"To the Hendin-Peter!"

*runs out and flys a huge Peter-faced blimp, eventually crashing and blowing up*

"Oh, my, God, Joe, I am so sorry."

"How can you afford these things!?" -Family Guy (TV)

[The Most Awesome Jared]

"As a vampire you were a piece of ****, now you're nothing but dog ****"

~Alucard after killing Luke Valentine
http://youtube.com/watch?v=zKwch-Z_oyE (Intense violence and some language)


EDIT: Joe, when are you going to block ****?

[Akai]

Hey. That's true. If it's not blocked, it's not a curse... and Jared didn't avoid it... He gets off free! Love it of shove it, Mods!! XD

EDIT, nah, I got it : D

"Excuse me, Prof Quirrel, but may I borrow Wood for a moment please." -Harry Potter PS (movie)

~Ok, who else giggled at the mention of "Wood"?~

[HobbesI]

Mr. Bean's Holiday

(Security cameras watching Mr. Bean walk straight through the road)

Security Man 1: "Look at that man! He's walking straight through the road!"
Security Man 2: "No, I think he's just an American."

(Both in French)

[Akai]

Ow... Insult. Haha.

"They appear to be playing some sort of game... Looks really stupid." -FLCL (TV)

((BTW- They are playing War, with air riffles and shooting the crap out of each other.))

[Shiny Espeon]

Please don't SPAM guys. D:

"Haha! I LOVE Cindy Campell!" - Tom Ryan from Scary Movie 4

This is the ending after the ending. I love this part, especially when Tom bends Oprah's fingers backwards. XD

[Akai]

Who's SPAMming, other than you now? If it's not reported, it's fine, and there is a quote posted, so chill.

"Welcome to Wal*Mart. Get you sh** and get out!"

"Well, I'm what you call a Player In a Manager Position..."
"A what?"
"A pimp!"

"He put me in the vegetable steamer."
"Peanut! You were suppose to take him to the spa!"
"I did!"
"No, you didn't."
"Well, it's the same thing. It gets hot, it gets steamy and it goes DING!"

"And trust me. You will not do well in prison."
"And why not?"
"'Come 'ere, Puppet Boy... Make your Daddy talk.'"

---All from Jeff Dunham's act (TV)

[RegiMaster]

Mr. Bean's Holiday

(Security cameras watching Mr. Bean walk straight through the road)

Security Man 1: "Look at that man! He's walking straight through the road!"
Security Man 2: "No, I think he's just an American."

(Both in French)

He does'nt say American, he says English, I have the whole movie with english subtitles.

----------------------
Digimon Season 3

Rika: Why are you here? Are you here to declare your love for me?
Takato: No, Yes, I mean No, Auhh Yes! ahh NO!

[Alexi8945]

"I can't tell the difference between Whizzo Butter and this dead crab." - Monty Python's Flying Circus

[Akai]

"Alright, I have a leg, three breasts and a wing." -Friends (TV)

**BTW- They're talking about CHICKEN, you pervs!**

[RegiMaster]

Avatar The Last Airbender - BOOK 1 - Chapter 5: The Earth King

Katara: Let Us Leave!
Boomi (King): Lettuce Leave?!

[Shiny Espeon]

*Gasp* "The White *****!" - Jack Swallows from Epic Movie

XD

I'll prolly edit with more. This specific one was on my mind, though.

[Alexi8945]

"Jean: What did you call me?
Ly: ...My bit of crackling.
Jean: You used to call me Pooh.
Ly: Yes, but you can't very well call a girl 'my bit of pooh' can you?"
-As Time Goes By, a British television show

[Catty]

"There are three types of We's.
1. We, as in us three.
2. We, as in we the people
or my favorite: wheeeeeeeee!" Cosmo in Fairly Oddparents

[RegiMaster]

I love the Epic Movie

"Bow Down To The Queen Asshole!" The Dwarf says to Peter when Peter enters Garnia for the first time.